Wednesday, May 05, 2004
My mom was cutting out a picture of my dad from last Mother's Day. It's a cute Polaroid picture...it's my dad holding a card and a bouquet of flowers. The picture he actually gave to my mom has a little note written on it that says "A card, flowers and me!"
When we found that picture back in March, I just about lost it. I looked at it this morning and smiled sweetly as the tears rolled down.
This will be my first birthday without my daddy. Did I mention I was born on their second anniversary? May 8, 1970. So that's usually a busy weekend: my birthday, my parent's anniversary, and Mother's Day. We'll be busy again this weekend: Friday I'm in Disneyland with a friend, Saturday my family and I are in Palmdale, and Sunday in Alhambra.
My mom doesn't want any presents this weekend. She almost wants the days not to exist. She took me shopping yesterday and I got a few necklaces for my birthday.
In some ways, I feel the way she does. I'm afraid to celebrate. It's a bittersweet blessing to have been born on their second anniversary. It's always been fun when my dad was around...and I know it will be fun again in the years to come. But it's just so sad right now.
I'm going to try not to be melancholy when I'm at Disneyland...the happiest place on earth. The last time I went to Disneyland was with my family, although I did go to The Magic Kingdom in Disney World last April. I want to have fun, which I know I will. But my father will always be on my mind.
When we found that picture back in March, I just about lost it. I looked at it this morning and smiled sweetly as the tears rolled down.
This will be my first birthday without my daddy. Did I mention I was born on their second anniversary? May 8, 1970. So that's usually a busy weekend: my birthday, my parent's anniversary, and Mother's Day. We'll be busy again this weekend: Friday I'm in Disneyland with a friend, Saturday my family and I are in Palmdale, and Sunday in Alhambra.
My mom doesn't want any presents this weekend. She almost wants the days not to exist. She took me shopping yesterday and I got a few necklaces for my birthday.
In some ways, I feel the way she does. I'm afraid to celebrate. It's a bittersweet blessing to have been born on their second anniversary. It's always been fun when my dad was around...and I know it will be fun again in the years to come. But it's just so sad right now.
I'm going to try not to be melancholy when I'm at Disneyland...the happiest place on earth. The last time I went to Disneyland was with my family, although I did go to The Magic Kingdom in Disney World last April. I want to have fun, which I know I will. But my father will always be on my mind.
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